Modest Mango

Ladies and Gents, I have returned.

‘Where have you been?!’, I hear you cry. I have been otherwise engaged. Moved to London, done some stuff, run another perfectly smooth MTL draft etc. etc.

Although I may long for my student days, where MTL updates were long and plentiful, sadly these will have to be reduced to every other week going forward. I have not the time.

No more time wasting, let’s get straight to it.

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To be honest… It kind of feels right, doesn’t it?

Congratulations Phil. In a year where fantasy was truly dominated by the return of Michael Vick, it is only fair that the lucky chump who had waiver priority that week and nabbed a bit of Mike Vick is our MTL 2010 Champion. To show you just how wacky fantasy football is… the undrafted Mike Vick replaced Leon Washington on Chan’s roster. He was also traded (under highly questionable circumstances) to the Giant Rats for Santana Moss. I bet the Giant Rats wish they had reneged on that sneaky deal before sending Vick back the other way.

It is worth noting that Chan drafted pretty horribly this year. Adrian Peterson was great. Matt Schaub was ok. Number 3 pick? Ryan Mathews. Number 4? Ochocinco. Fantasy football is bullshit, and I love every second of it.

The final wasn’t close, Vick and Matt Forte did their thing as the Boilermakers’ struggled to mount any kind of challenge. But all credit goes to Michael J, who took his team from 10th place in 2009, to 2nd place in 2010. A v. v. impressive turnaround.

In third place, the desperately unlucky M-Hozz. 13-1 in the regular season, an MTL record. Stopped by MJ, Robbie Gould and the Bears D in the semi-finals, 3 points short of fulfilling his place in the final. Had the Hozz led his Tantrum to face off against the Hustle this week, he would have lost by a single point. I, for one, am glad that he was spared such a fate. I worry poor Michael’s head would have simply exploded. A truly exceptional season Michael, congratulations on yr bronze medal.

In 4th place, up from 11th in 2009, your Fearless Leader. Disappointed how the last two weeks panned out, but still proud to have a division title under my belt. And am hoping that my beloved ‘Hawks follow my lead. A sneaky division win, followed by a proud but ultimately fruitless playoff appearance. SEA!

Here are your final 2010 standings.

1. Hustle

2. Boilermakers

3.Tantrum

4. Farrakhans

5. Goblins

6. Red Tops

7. Giant Rats

8. Wrangers

9. Turtles

10. H’Birds

11. Warriors

12. Baby Bulls

Goat of the year, unfortunately, has to be Chris Burrows, for taking his 2009 Number 1 Seed Bulls to bottom of the pile. I’ll blame Brett Favre, and hope that 2011 turns out better for you Chris.

That will do it for the MTL 2010 season. I will hold another advisory period in late spring/early summer where can can discuss potential developments for next season. We WILL be implementing a keeper system, of some type, into proceedings. Not sure how yet. Open to discussion.

Hopefully there will be some kind of Superburrl event in February, where Phil can collect his Champion’s Bell, and someone will be collecting 60 quid of gambling juice. I realise there are exams of a medical nature happening around this time, but hopefully something cool can happen, even if it isn’t a whole weekend of rad shit like last year.

So until next time, best of luck to the Bears, Eagles, Jets, Pats, Falcons, and most of all, this Sunday night, the mighty Seattle Seahawks. All I want is to be destroyed by a travelling New Orleans Saints team on Wildcard Weekend. That’s all i’ve ever wanted.

Hozz: 33-21-1

Stevie Nicks: 32-23

G-Money: 30-24-1

Finners: 29-24-1

Chanman: 28-25-2

Haircomb*: 28-26-1

*Failed to email Week 14 picks, given average score for week of 2-3.

All left to play for. Be smart guys. There’s 60 quid in it.

Best day, best day. MTL WEST CHAMPIONS! GIMME AN F! GIMME AN O! GIMME AN R-FAR!

The post season feels way better than finishing the second worst team, for sure. I’m fired up. I kind of think that I might be divinely inspired, like Kanye. I think i’m gonna win the trophy. I’m almost certain that I am.

Last week ended as expected, Hozzle won again (getting boring tbh), Johnston lost with a measly 47 pts but still made it, Chan won, I won. There we have it, our gallant Final Four. Also worth noting, I outscored everyone this week. HITTING THE PLAY OFFS ON A HOT STREAK!

1- TANTRUM

2- HUSTLE

3- FARRAKHANS!

WILDCARD! BOILERMAKERS!

Hozz plays Johnston, Chan plays Christie. Winners meet balls deep in a final.

I’m feeling it. Are you?

The lives of those in the Modest Mango web are very busy these days, updates are few and far between. But with one week remaining in the MTL regular season, an update is essential, so as to paint the picture of potential glory/gross failure.

Here, are, the, crucial, standings!

The East is wrapped up. M-Hozzle, much to the chagrin of everyone else, has been nothing short of dominant this season. He must be stopped. One can only hope.

The West is still up for grabs. If I beat J-Bail, the division is mine, at an NFC West-esque .500! So proud, so proud. If I fail to win, things get complicated. I believe, that the first tie-breaker is division record. I believe. Then it will be points scored. The other match up in the West is the turtles vs the Rats, which comes into play if I lose. In such an event, the winner of that match wins the division. If Neil wins, he wins on winning percentage, the only team at .500. If the Rats win, all three teams tied at 6-8, their intra-division record of 4-2 will come out trumps.

The Central… eesh. If Chan beats the H’birds, the title is his. If he loses… the winner of the Goblins and Wranglers wins the division.

As for Wildcards… it should be the Boilermakers. It will be the Goblins IF, the b’makers lose, the Goblins win, and the Goblins outscore the b’makers by more than 23 points. Otherwise, Mickey J is in the play offs.

If your team hasn’t been mentioned… you suck. Enjoy the consolation ladder!

Again, apologies for the awful formatting! I’m computer illiterate, and this has never happened before! Sorry guys.

Play off preview next week!