This Glaswegian Life #3

Posted by Philip on November 10th, 2007 — 1:28am

From modestmango.com, it’s This Glaswegian Life. I’m Philip Chan. Our story today in four acts.

Act 1: Apple And Blackberry Crumble,
Act 2: Phil attempts to eat a pomegranate for the first time,
Act 3: The End Of The Beginning,
Act 4: The Dalek Cookie Jar.

Act 1: Apple And Blackberry Crumble

I had a very cultured evening last week that involved a very civilized home cooked meal, a trip to see a production of Oliver! and continual accusations of Neil being a paedophile. But back to the meal. My contribution was an apple and blackberry crumble, cooked from scratch.

Here’s the recipe:

1. Get some Bramley apples, chop them up and put them into a Pyrex dish (preferably one that is exactly the same size as the one I have). Also put some blackberries in.

2. Squeeze some lemon juice over everything (but not too much, otherwise like mine did, it will taste like Jif… sorry, Cif.)

3. Put shovel loads of demerererararer sugar over everything.

4. In a mixing bowl (preferably one that is exactly the same size as the one I have) mix flour with butter, Alpen, and loads more demererarara sugar. Put all this over the stuff in the Pyrex dish.

5. Bake in an oven.

Here’s a picture of dear friend and regular reader Jonny Baillie digging into the dessert.

And here’s the recipe again in the style of Gordon Ramsay:

Bramley.
Chop.
Blackberries.
Pyrex.
Lemon.
Sugar.
Bowl.
Flour.
Butter.
Knead.
Alpen.
Sugar.
Mix.
Sprinkle.
Bake.

Apple and blackberry crumble…

Done.

Act 2: Phil attempts to eat a pomegranate for the first time

Act 3: The End Of The Beginning

You may remember the disc fiasco I mentioned previously that involved me moronically air-bouncing The Chameleon down a hole in the quadrangle of the main building of Glasgow University, several minutes before I had to go in to sit an anatomy exam on the head and neck.

Since then several schemes involving ropes, ladders, long poles and a system of pulleys have been devised in an attempt to retrieve the misplaced disc. To date nothing has been executed. I couldn’t help but feel slightly empty without my disc. It was, after all, my very first disc and it has (had) been with me since the start of my ultimate days. Now it’s probably gone forever.

But then I realised that perhaps it was actually quite fitting that I lost my first disc on that particular day. Technically my 3 months entitlement of beginnerhood is over. Now if I wanted to play, I would have to play with the big boys and the big girls.

And so I did. I was given the awesome opportunity to play for the FarFlung 2nd team last weekend in the Scottish University Indoor Regionals. I’ll not go into it, since I think in the past month I’ve talked enough about frisbee tournaments already. All you need to know is that out of 20 teams we came 11th and the first team came 4th, just missing out on qualifying for the nationals, and that during the tournament I played my best frisbee yet.

And did I get a new disc? Damn right I did.

Glows in the dark too.

Act 4: The Dalek Cookie Jar

Last week we were invaded by what The Doctor told us was the last remaining Dalek in Scotland. It tried to exterminate us but we fought it off with battered Mars bars, copious gallons of Irn Bru, and the highest incidence of lung cancer in the world.

I know what you’re thinking, and yes it is the greatest thing to ever be conceived in the history of biscuit storage. Thanks, Laura!

I’m Philip Chan, back next week, with more stories of This Glaswegian Life.

Category: Food, Frisbee, This Glaswegian Life One comment »

One Response to “This Glaswegian Life #3”

  1. Michael

    That disc is awesome – the star is just like the star from the Dallas Cowboys. As for the cookie jar, I just can’t wait to raid that little bastard.


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